rewire liar

rewire liar and disassociate the ends
we won't make it over this waterfall in once piece
the barrel will be slats and splinters that we'll cling to with our desperate last hopes
but splintered wood never saved anybody from drowning
your lungs will be so tight and full of river
shredding your throat with every screaming breath you try to take
gargling spit blood and skin trying to ask someone to save you
but it's hard to understand a dying man
one fair hand will reach out and grasp at clumped strands of hair

somniphobia wanderlust and pinpoints

is the subtitle, I haven't changed it in a while.
it's from when sleeping was terrifying for me and so I would do as
much as I could to avoid it.
It was literally a physical experience of fear when I thought about
going to bed.
mostly it's disappeared since then, because I sleep with my other part
all the time.
At night he is always there beside me.
Even in my dreadful sleep paralysis times
I have heard his steady breathing and that is
what rescued me.
now it's time to sleep and I'm without him for the first time in so long.
It's not terrifying but... overwhelmingly sad.
I am thankful for tomorrow.

dear little thing

inside you little box there
can you see me looking at you?

Vampyroteuthis infernalis

how do you describe

that ache inside
it makes salty water leak from my eyes
turns my limbs inward and outward at the same time
my skin is dead
numb tips of fingers and need for nothing
except for touches of your face and
the rest of you
the rest of me
I need this

distant

is that a reused title I'm unsure
I'm in a strange state
geographically it should be and I suppose is familiar
but my mind and senses are drawn in down and confused, sad and missing you
the once comforting things here are now painful and upsetting
I want your dark hair twisting in my fingers
your perfect face picking up hints of blue in the light from the television
all pretenses of magical mumblings have left me but
been replaced by love for you